torsdag 19 juli 2012

"I don't want to say goodbye." ♥ 26

He looked at me with tears in his eyes. His hand was on my cheek and his soft lips were pressed against mine. 


"I don't want to say goodbye,' His warm breath tickled my ear, when he whispered the words. 
"Then don't." I kissed him back with more passion this time, as to convince him to stay. "Stay with me"
Sam shook his head and I could feel his hand fall down from my face to my waist. He pushed me closer against his body and I let him.
"I have to. I already talked to Eddie and he agreed to being your manager again.'
Our lips were only seperated when we were speaking. I laid down on the bed and Sam followed my lead.
He placed small kisses on my neck, causing me to let a soft satisfied sigh, slip out of my mouth.
'But I wan't you, Sam. I love you.'
Sam stopped kissing me, and pushed himself up of my body, but his face was still just centimeters away from mine. The room suddenly went all quiet, and I immediatley regretted saying that. Sam's lips pulled up into a soft smile, and he gazed down at me, taking me in head to toe.
"I'll never find a girl like you. Ever again. And I'm the biggest idiot for letting you go, but I only do it because I'm not good for you..."
I opened my mouth, to protest, but he put his finger to my lips.
"No, Demi. There's no excuse. I shoved you, and you fell. I'll never forgive myself for that. Ever."
I could see how much he regretted it and how hurt he was. 
I took his face in my hands, and our lips collided. They moved in sync, and that's when I knew. I wanted more.
I pulled Sam's shirt off and he continued kissing me. On my lips and on my neck... His lips moved down to my chest. I took of my top in a haste, withouth thinking about it, and I was laying under Sam, in nothing but my underwear. He smiled and his thumb stroked my cheek while he was kissing me, and his hands started moving up and down my naked skin, and my hands were all over his abs. 
Before he took off his pants, or did anything like that, he paused for a moment and looked into my eyes, with a sincere, honest expression, as if he was asking me if it was okay.
I was sure. I knew this was what I wanted, so I nodded and we carried on. I helped him take his skinny jeans off, in only like 5 seconds. He leaned in closer to me, and his lips continued to move from my chest, down to my navel, and I gasped when his tounge touched my warm skin.
We kept on going, and it was like I was uncovering a new side of him every minute of our love making. It was amazing. Sam was my first, and I would never forget him.

Demi woke up the next morning. She was wearing nothing, except for the sheet wrapped around her body. Sam was sleeping next to her with his arm around her waist. She turned around, so that her face was close to  him, and kissed him gently on his lips.
Sam slowly opened his eyes, and Demi could feel his smile through their kiss.
'When are you leaving?' She whispered, trying not to leat the tears come through.
Sam kissed her on her forehead, before mumbling 'At noon.'
Demi looked over his shoulder, at her alarmclock. He only had 2 hours left.
'Sam, please don't go...' Demi knew it was hopeless, but she still wished that he would listen to her.
Sam started playing with her hair, when he was speaking. Demi closed her eyes and just savored the moment.
'I want to stay here with you. Forever. But I can't. Not after what happened last night, between me and Liam.' Demi could see how his eyes went dark, when he pronounced Liam's name.
Demi drew herself away from Sam's embrace, and looked down, with the tears filling her eyes.
'You still haven't told me what happened.'
Sam moaned and laid back at his pillow.
'I want to tell you, but I can't.'
Demi held his face in her hands and forced him to look at her.
'Sam, you can trust me.'
He sighed and nodded.
'I know, but I don't want you involved. I don't want you to hate me for something I didn't do.'
Demi rolled her eyes and turned away from him.
She could hear Sam sigh.
He got up from the bed and got dressed. Demi was still faced the other way, so he couldn't see her tears falling.
When he was done getting dressed, he walked around to her side of the bed and sat down next to her.
'I have to go,' he mumbled. Demi avoided getting eyecontact with him, and didn't say anything.
Sam wrapped his arms around her and kissed her on the cheek.
Demi couldn't resist it and threw her arms around him too. She started sobbing, with her forehead on his shoulder, and he just stroked her hair and held her close.
Demi looked up at him and he smiled.
'You know I love you, right? I always will. And this is not the last time we see eachother. Okay, baby?'
Demi nodded and Sam wiped away her tears.
She smiled and kissed him. They both knew it was their last kiss, and it was filled with so much passion. Demi deepened the kiss by letting her tounge play around in his, and Sam took over. He pulled Demi closer to his chest, and Demi let her fingers run through his hair.
She had his bottom lip between her teeth as they parted and with her eyes still closed, their lips seperated.
Demi turned around, knowing her tears would come back if she looked at him again.
'Sam, just go. Please? This is how I want to remember our last minutes together.'
She could feel the bed move, as he got up from it and she could hear him drag his bags from the livingroom to her door. She could hear the click when he opened the door.
There was a pause.
'Demi, I love you. Don't get upset because I'm leaving. That would just break me to pieces. Go out with your friends, and carry on with life, just like you used to before we met in Mexico, six months ago.'
Demi nodded and wiped away her tears in silence.
'I love you too, Sam. And we're going to skype, everyday, okay?'
Sam laughed and Demi knew she was going to miss his laugh.
'Everyday, baby.' Demi smiled, but Sam couldn't see it because she was still turned away from him. 
Sam paused, before continuing. 'I'm only leaving because it's probably what's best for you, and I only want what's best for you.'
'But you're just hurting me, by leaving. What's best for me is to be with you.'
'I wish that was the case. Bye, Demi. No, I mean I'll see you soon. You're the only one. Remember that.'
'Thank you for being the only boyfriend I've ever had, that I could trust 100 procent.'
Sam smiled through his pain, and closed the door behind him, knowing he had just made the hardest decision in his life, by leaving the only girl he had ever loved in the room he had just left. But it was fine. He could handle the hurt and the pain, as long as it made her happier.

That night Demi wrote a song about Sam. She named it 'Fix A Heart'.

Inga kommentarer:

Skicka en kommentar